contagious inspiration

I go through weeks where I’m inspired to write and weeks where I just write regardless if I’m inspired or not. The latter is definitely the hardest and not what I prefer, but it’s reality. For a while now, I have forgotten about the things in my life that help keep me inspired and motivated when it comes to using my gifts specifically in writing. Joys and delights like:

Slowly, I’ve been rediscovering these joys more intentionally and I’m realizing that whatever inspires me should in some form or another, inspire another person to move to action. To do something different.

Inspiration should infect other people. It shouldn’t be hoarded. Contained. Or kept a secret.

If the inspiration I receive is all about me, that would be a tragedy. The people who have inspired me the most in life, gave themselves away. And what they had to give was contagious, producing a ripple effect.

I know inspiration in writing will still come and go in the seasons of life, but I want to keep at it. I want to inspire others to take action in ways I will never know about.

What inspires you?

Thoughts on Jennifer Knapp’s Interview

There has been a lot going on in my heart since I read Christianity Today’s interview with Jennifer Knapp. I have felt sadness, compassion, anger, confusion, and disappointment. One thing that I can’t escape thinking about is a question that Matt Chandler asks in a lot of his interviews and sermons: “Where is the fight against sin?”

I think we often forget that we’re in a battle against our own flesh. Not just the world and culture, but the sinful lusts and desires that rage within us. Francis Chan has also spoken lately about the “middle road” that so many Christians have created, neglecting to follow the narrow road of Christ… “If I can just follow some of Jesus’ words, then I can do whatever else I want…”

As followers who love the Lord, we’re called to follow even the HARD words of Jesus like denying self and getting rid of the sin and filth within us (James 1:21). We can’t lie and say that his words are easy, and we don’t have the right to pick and choose what we want to follow.

Will we struggle with sin? As long as we’re breathing we will, but our desire won’t be to live in that sin as a continuing lifestyle void of confession, repentance, or “struggling well.”

There is so much to Jennifer’s story than I will ever know or need to know, but from what I do know that I did not see in her interview with Christianity Today, is a fight against that sin. There was an acceptance of it. And that makes me sad. I want to see her make war with it.

So I guess my next response in all this is to look in the mirror and make sure I’m really engaged in the daily battle against my flesh.

Did you read the article? What are your thoughts on the recent news?

Prayer for Matt Chandler

My heart broke today in hearing the news about Matt Chandler’s health via The Village Church blog. Matt has a wonderful ministry partnership and friendship with my work. He just spoke at our conference in November. And just in the last year, I’ve listened to a lot of his podcasts. He’s my favorite pastor (or should I say “podcast preacher.”)

God has used Matt to rekindle a passion in my heart for the gospel and God’s glory. A lot of the writing on this blog has been inspired by a mix of Matt Chandler sermons and God’s word.

I’ve asked God a lot today: Why Matt Chandler? Of all people, why him? And God continues to whisper: This is my calling right now for him to take on brain cancer. I’m sovereign. Will you trust me?

And all I can do is trust.

The hospital where Matt is getting rehab is a block from our apartment and I can see parts of it from my window on the 9th floor. This evening while in my son’s bedroom, I saw the sun setting over the hospital. Bursts of magenta, orange, pink, and navy blue filled the sky.

The sun set reminded me that God is sovereign and is in total control of Matt’s life. And I loved the tweet that Matt wrote today:

Path report is 2ndary at best…good report doesn’t mean much, bad report doesn’t mean anything…my days r numbered and nt by ths report

It is God alone who determines our days. I pray that Matt and his precious family will endure well and experience God’s strength and love in the days ahead.

We love you Matt, Lauren, Audrey, Norah, and Reid.

RightNow Conference Highlights


Kay Warren, Lonnie Smith, Matt Chandler


me and Donald Miller


Kari Jobe, Lonnie Smith, Amena Brown

I feel like I’ve been saved all over again. Well, that’s what I told Jeremiah on the last day of the RightNow Conference.

The theme of our conference: Trading in the pursuit of the American Dream for a world that desperately needs Christ, spoke to me in so many ways and I don’t want to live my life any other way than to be a “trader.”

Here are a few highlights, nuggets, and take-aways I got this past weekend:

1.) I am selfish and don’t naturally think of others every day, so I must make a conscious effort to trade in my selfishness to help others who need physical healing and help, but most of all, who need the gospel.

2.) Even Francis Chan has wanted to quit. If someone like him can admit that, we should too. Leadership and ministry is a difficult, messy, but well worth it road.

3.) Living for and following Jesus requires a dangerous surrender. Kay Warren encouraged us on Fri. evening to surrender our life to the cause of Christ and to be willing to die for it. Her boldness inspired me and I don’t think anyone left that room unchanged that night.

4.) Matt Chandler’s passion for the gospel is unmatched. He helped us to get the gospel right and I can’t even begin to describe the magnitude at which the Holy Spirit uses him when he teaches God’s word.

5.) Eating Bar-b-que with Kari Jobe and her band. Jeremiah and I had a good time getting to know Kari and her band during dinner. Kari led our worship at the event and it was beautiful and God-exalting. Hearing her sing Revelation Song, Healer, and I Live to Worship You live was the best. She was a joy to meet in person. Check out her music at!

6.) Getting to see Brian Mosley, Marc McCartney, Lonnie Smith, Natalie Drew, and all our video producers in action. Brian is my boss and the Founder of Rightnow. Marc is our Dir. of Events. Lonnie is the Dir. of Church Relations. Natalie was in charge of all the details of recruiting volunteers and tons of the behind the scenes stuff. Every day in the office, I see their passion for our generation, but this weekend I got to see it on stage and among thousands of leaders. It was awesome!

7.) Spending an hour with Anne Jackson over pizza. We had so much fun talking about writing, her upcoming book, marriage, and things we struggle with. It was great getting to know her husband Chris as well (aka her road manager for the trip). Just in one hour, I felt like I’d known her all my life. Now I know why the world is so crazy about her!

8.) Getting a personal note from Kay Warren, and her book Dangerous Surrender. I received a very sweet note from Kay along with her book. I never had the chance to meet her though until after I got the book. She told me someone told her about me. I was shocked and humbled and right now I really want to thank whoever did that. 🙂

So the conference is over and now we are packing all the video and content from the main sessions into the upcoming RightNow Leadership Development Kit. We have lots to do and are so excited to get the experience out to many more leaders.

What stirs your affections?

869617_84392121We’re interviewing Matt Chandler this weekend at the LeadNow conference here in Dallas. I was preparing some interview questions yesterday and was stirred by some things he’s said in an article with Leadership Journal. At The Village Church where Matt pastors, he believes that sanctification begins by answering two questions: What stirs your affections for Jesus Christ? And what robs you of those affections?

Those questions reminded me of my post from Monday on simplicity. I think the bottom line of what I wrote on that post deals with my own affections. And most importantly, what things might be robbing me of putting my full joy and delight in Christ alone?

In the LJ interview Matt goes on to say that “Many of the things that stifle growth are morally neutral. They’re not bad things. Facebook is not bad. Television and movies are not bad. I enjoy TV, but it doesn’t take long for me to begin to find humorous on TV what the Lord finds heartbreaking…”

I appreciate Matt’s honesty in that he’s not exempt from certain affections that could stifle his growth either. It doesn’t matter if he’s a pastor of a renowned church. The reality is that he’s human. And no one is exempt.

I was reading this morning in Proverbs 4 and in verse 23 it said to “Watch over your heart with all diligence, for from it flow the springs of life.”

I was reminded once again of where I’m placing my affections. What am I allowing myself to see with my eyes, hear with my ears, believe in my heart, ponder in my mind, and then what do my actions reveal? If someone were to take a sneak peak inside my heart, will they see that my deepest affections are for Jesus?

I hope so.

It goes on to say in verse 26 to, “Watch the path of your feet and all your ways will be established.”

It’s a challenge to watch over my heart and the path that I tread each day, but the command is there for protection so that the fruit of my life will be what God wants- not my own fleshly desires.

I’m excited to see if Matt will hit on this at the conference at some point. I’m hoping he will!

Are you a trader?

SGT_LogoThe term “trader” has infused where I work for quite a while. In 2000, my boss Brian Mosley founded the RightNow Campaign to help 20s and 30s connect to opportunities here and abroad to put their faith into action. The mission of RightNow is simple: To help our generation trade in the pursuit of the American Dream for a world that desperately needs Christ.

Every year, we put on the Rightnow Conference and it’s coming up in less than two weeks. This year’s theme is The Mission of the Church Matters. The line up includes pastors and authors Donald Miller, Francis Chan, Mark Batterson, Kay Warren, Matt Chandler, George Barna, and more.

I’ll be working at the conference, scribbling away on my note pad to prepare to write the curriculum for our upcoming RightNow Leadership Kit we’re producing. I absolutely cannot wait to soak in what these guys have to say.

Bluefish TV, the RightNow conference, and our new site all stand under the umbrella of the RightNow Campaign’s mission of trading in the pursuit of the American Dream. Every thing we produce is to help others put their faith into action.

So that’s a little background info you may or may not have wanted! Now that leads me to expound a little more on Small Group Trader.

Our name was originally called Small Group Exchange but we decided to narrow our focus more to the idea of being a trader because Small groups aren’t an end to themselves- we’re calling small groups to battle against the “me-centered” way of thinking (that we all struggle with at times) by trading it in for the the missional call of Jesus – to care for the homeless, minister to the sick, and share Christ’s love with our neighbors.

I’m super excited about this change as it gives us a more clarified mission to strive for as a ministry, calling others to live out Jesus’ command. A nice home, car, clothes, savings account, etc. are good things that God wants me to enjoy, but it’s the pursuit and striving for them that I have to question. I have to constantly ask myself: Am I living for the dream or pursuing what really matters for eternity?

As the Content Editor for Small Group Trader, I can’t wait to see where this site goes and how small groups across the country will be impacted by this mission. If you’re a small group leader, small groups or community pastor, have thoughts you want to share on leadership, or have been impacted at all by being in a small group, let me know.

Step out and share your story. Be an encouragement to others who are trying to fulfill God’s mission for their lives.

You can email me at editor [at] smallgrouptrader [dot] [com]

How are you being a trader with your time, talents, and treasures? Are you willing to give up the pursuit of the American Dream for a world that desperately needs Christ?

How Pride Kills Prayer

Untitled-1In thinking further on yesterday’s post If God is sovereign, why pray? I thought about a few more things when it comes to prayer inspired from Matt Chandler’s message The Art of Prayer.

I’ve heard lots of sermons preached that have given me a step by step outline on how to pray that include acronyms to follow and certain disciplines to have a better prayer life. I’m not saying they aren’t effective or that I haven’t used them- some of them have really helped me stay disciplined. But most of the time my prayer issues are not because of the how-to’s but deal more with the state of my heart.

Pride says, “I’ve got it figured out. I can handle it all on my own. When I really need God, that’s when I’ll start leaning on him…” These are the kind of control issues I have to battle.

And the reality is that pride kills prayer, making me useless in building God’s kingdom and being about his work. Pride is dealt with when I confess. Repent. Humble myself. Beg for a changed heart. Ask God to help me with any guilt or shame I might feel that would keep me from coming to him.

I love how Hebrews says to approach the throne of grace. It’s all about grace. Jesus gives us grace and mercy to help us in our time of need because he’s been there. He can sympathize with our struggles and pain because he was tempted in every way, but was without sin. He knows we need grace and mercy- we are just so weak without him. There is nothing that he doesn’t understand.

He wants to take my pride and replace it with something greater. He wants a heart that is humble. Humility is what breathes life back into prayer again. And I know it’s something I have to pray for every day.

Has pride ever effected your prayers? How so? Why do you think it’s so hard sometimes to have a humble heart?

If God is Sovereign, Why Pray?


Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of Lights.

Every night we put our son John down for bed, Jeremiah and I pray that he will come to know the Lord at an early age. We think about the responsibility that’s on our shoulders to raise him in a loving home, display a loving marriage, teach him God’s word, live a life that does not say “do as I say, not as I do…” And to do this by leaning on God’s grace and not our human effort.

A truth that we acknowledge is that we can’t force John to love God in the future. That’s a decision he must come to on his own. We also know that God is sovereign over his life. And sometimes it’s easy to say well, “Why pray for his salvation if God already knows?”

As you know, a question like this is a great debate in lots of hearts today. And it often keeps us from approaching God or even giving him the time of day.

I was encouraged to hear Matt Chandler hit on the topic of prayer yesterday. A few points he made out of Scripture have given me great hope today.

We know that God listens to his people and has changed his mind based on a request (Moses in Exodus). We know in Luke that we’re to ask, and it will be given to us. To seek and we will find.

But what we miss out on is the act of praying in faith.

Having the faith that he will do what we ask because we’re seeking him. Having faith to lean on his grace for every moment in our lives. We pray in faith because we’ve been commanded to and prayer is really for us, more than it is for God. It changes us and it’s about participating in what He is doing.

As Jeremiah and I continue to pray for John’s salvation, we’re praying in faith that God will answer our prayers. As imperfect parents, we’re trusting that God will use us as his  tool to help lead John to the cross.

When we believe that God will do something, I think that changes everything and gives us great hope in his future grace.

“So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you” (Luke 11:9).

What are you praying for today, hoping that God will answer? Do you have the faith that He will do it?

What’s Inspiring Me of Late

cannons1Several things have been inspiring me of late:

1.) Jesus- of course. all the time. without him, who in the world would I be? enough said.

2.) My husband Jeremiah– his constant encouragement, accountability, and unconditional love for me.

3.) My son John– watching his brown eyes stare into mine. his laughter and joy. He makes me want to be a better mom and woman.

4.) My job– I love working with a team of highly creative producers, writers, and graphic designers. We have a great time together. My boss is solid and loves the Lord. Bluefish is impacting so many lives and I love just being a small part of it.

5.) My church Watermark. Spurring me on to authentic community and loving this city. Gary Haugen with International Justice Mission will be speaking thus Sunday (can’t wait).

6.) Matt Chandler (his podcasts). I appreciate his constant focus on Christ and boasting in Him alone. My coworker Lonnie said he’s going to connect me and Jeremiah to Matt for coffee one day (yay!)

7.) John Piper. I’m almost through his book Don’t Waste Your Life. It has challenged me like no other book. And is causing me to do some deep soul searching (or perhaps sin searching).

8.) Musicians: Phil Wickham, Brandon Heath, Chris Tomlin, Fernando Ortega, Meredith Andrews, Laura Story. Some old. Some new. These are just a few but their artistry stands out among the rest. Their focus is obvious. God has used them to inspire my writing. Meredith lived next to me on dorm 19-1 at LU. I’m extremely proud of her and how God is using her.

Who or what’s inspiring You?

LeadNow & Fusion 2008

I’m getting really excited about our LeadNow and Fusion events coming up in November here in Dallas. It will be here before we know it! This year is different than any other year because we’re giving leaders the opportunity to host a simulcast at their church or attend a simulcast at a location close to them. This definitely helps with gas prices and the way the economy is functioning as a whole right now.

These events are for you if you’re a leader of twenties and thirties and if you are in your twenties and thirties. I can’t think of a better place to grow in my relationship with God and others- learning under great leaders like Erwin McManus, Matt Chandler, Margaret Feinberg, Francis Chan, and my very own pastor, Todd Wagner. I can’t wait to show the promo DVD to my small group and other friends. Baby John will probably be about one month old then so I am hoping we can have a little outing together, if possible. He’ll get to have some early exposure to some great people.

You can visit for way more information than I will post here. Feel free to email me or leave a comment if you have questions about these events and I can direct you to the right person here at Bluefish/The Rightnow Campaign. I really hope you will take advantage of this opportunity- especially my twenties and thirties readers!

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